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Originally posted on December 1, 2017 @ 2:55 pm

40 Snarky Funny Minions Quotes to Crack You Up

Feeling a little snarky and need to blow off some steam? Check out these hilariously snarky minion quotes ready to crack you up!

6+
snarky minion quote about drunk driving

No officer, I haven’t been drinking
I was trying to avoid all the potholes!
-Unknown

There’s a lot of them you see. 

6+
snarky minion quote about liars

Never argue with a liar.
You can’t win because they believe their own lies.
-Unknown

Just walk away..or close the window, because you’re likely arguing on the internet or phone. 

6+
snarky minion quote about stress

If stress burned calories,
I’d be a supermodel.
-Unknown

One of the best snarky minion quotes to share on New Years Day.

6+
snarky minion quote about diseases and syndromes

I’ve been diagnosed with C.R.S.
Can’t remember sh!t.
-Unknown

But what was the point of this post?

6+
use this snarky minion quote to reply to someone arguing on a forum

Oh, so you wanna argue?
BRING IT.
I GOT MY CAPS LOCK ON.
-Unknown

So ready. SO READY.

6+
funny minion quote about snarky advice givers

Just because I give advice,
doesn’t mean I know more than you,
it just means I’ve done more stupid sh!t!
-Unknown

I’m warning you..

6+
Snarky quotes about drunk people

Two most honest people in this world:
Drunk people and little kids.

One is more fun.

6+
snarky quotes about waving to strangers

I love waving at random people.
Because you know for the rest of the day they’re trying to figure out who I was.
😛
-Unknown

They just know they know my face, but from where?

6+
40 Snarky Funny Minions to Crack You Up

Everyone will be impressed.

6+
snarky minion remark about keeping mama happy

If mama ain’t happy,
ain’t nobody happy…
If grandma ain’t happy,
RUN!…
-Unknown

Grandma will get you.

6+
snarky quote from minions about growing up

I don’t want to be a grown up anymore.
It’s not nearly as much fun as it was supposed to be.
-Unknown

Refund please?

6+
snarky quote to tell people not to disturb you

I am temporarily out of order,
please try again later.
-Unknown

I may be out of order for a bit.

6+
snarky remark about manners from the minions

I was raised to say please and thank you!
Did someone forget to tell this generation?
-an OK Boomer

Yes, it seems so.

6+
funny minion quote about sexy presents

I tried to send you something sexy,
but the mailman told me to get out of the mailbox.
-Unknown

He’s just jealous!

6+
snarky minions remark about being silly with friends

Sometimes, being silly with a friend,
is the best therapy!
-Unknown

But sometimes it can be too fun.

6+
snarky remark about facebook relationship status

Instead of “SINGLE” as a marital status…
I prefer “Independently owned and operated”.
-Unknown

Nothing wrong with that.

6+
Snarky minion quote about sleeping in

I’m pretty certain,
that there is nothing more satisfying in life,
than sleeping in while someone else gets ready for work.
-Unknown

Best feeling ever. Snooze away.

6+
Snarky minions comeback to use when someone hurts you

Sweet as sugar,
hard as ice.
Hurt me once,
I’ll kill you twice.
-Unknown

Simple but sweet.

6+
snarky quote about relationships from the minions

Some relationships are like Tom and Jerry…
They irritate each other, tease each other,
but they still can’t live without each other.
-Unknown

Those are sometimes the best.

6+
Snarky quote about alcoholics from minions

Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary.
However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned,
if you drink too much of it,
it’s likely tequilya!
-Unknown

Ah, drunk wisdom.

6+
Snarky minion quote about sending texts

I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile.
Then you walk into a pole.
-Unknown

Um, ouch?

6+
snarky minion quotes about aging

It’s never too late to be what you want to be…
Unless you want to be younger,
then your’e screwed.
-Unknown

Pick a new dream.

6+
Funny snarky minion quotes about forgetfulness

I sometimes stop in the middle of the room and ask myself:
What was I going to do?
-Author Forgotten

Why did I come in here?

6+
funny minion meme about dinner suggestions

Wife: You pick dinner
Me: Pizza
Wife: No
Me: Tacos
Wife: No
Me: Subs
Wife: No
Me: WHAT DO YOU WANT?!
Wife: It’s up to you.
-Author killed in unfortunate kitchen accident

Spoiler: Wife picks the first thing you said.

6+
snarky weekend quote from minions

My Saturday was going pretty well
until I realized it was Sunday.
-Unknown

Worst Sunday ever.

6+
Snarky minion quote about taking insults

When people hurt you over and over again,
Think of them as SANDPAPER.
They scratch and hurt you,
but later you’ll be shining and polished.
While they end up USELESS.
-Unknown

Going to be a diamond.

6+
snarky minion quote about sleeping in

I always say “Morning”,
instead of “Good Morning”,
because if it were a good morning,
I’d still be in bed asleep!
-Unknown

It should just be “morning.”

6+
snarky quote from a woman by minions

Every woman’s dream is that a man will take her in his arms,
throw her into bed…
And clean the whole house while she sleeps.
-Unknown

What a sexy fantasy.

6+
snarky quote about being broke from minions

I’m so broke,
my nervous breakdown is on layaway.
-Unknown

It’s cool, I can make payments soon.

6+
Snarky minions remark about getting old

They’re not grey hairs,
I’m just growing tinsel.
-Unknown

Jingle, jingle!

6+
Funny Minion snarky remarks about christmas presents

Last year,
I asked Santa for the most awesome person ever for Christmas.
Next day I woke up in a box.
-Unknown

Well that solves that.

6+
Snarky minion quote about time

How to stop time: KISS
How to travel in time: READ
How to escape time: MUSIC
How to feel time: WRITE
How to waste time: SOCIAL MEDIA
-Unknown

Sad but true.

6+
Snarky and funny minion quote about christmas

Hey Santa,
if I’m good at being NAUGHTY,
which list do I go on?
-Unknown

 

Do I get to pick?

6+
snarky christmas minion quotes

Dear Santa,
I’ve been good all year!
Ok, most of the time.
Once in a while.
Nevermind, I’ll buy my own stuff.
-Unknown

Maybe next year, Santa.

6+
Snarky christmas themed minion quote

Santa saw your facebook photos.
You are getting clothes and a dictionary for Christmas.
-Unknown

Surprise!

6+
snarky 2020 minion quotes

Is it just me,
or does anyone else think we’re stuck in a snow globe,
and some jerk keeps giving it a shake!?

That’s 2020 in a nutshell!

6+
snarky santa minions meme

Don’t annoy me this week, because if you do…
I’ll give your number to all the kids,
and tell them it’s Santa’s Hotline.
-Unknown

Oh that’s cold.

6+
Snarky minions quote about life

There is always ups and downs in our lives.
So up the music,
down the cocktails
and make the most of what you’ve got!
-Unknown

Drink it up, live it up!

6+
Funny santa minions meme

Dear Santa,
Please bring me a self-cleaning house for Christmas this year.
Thank you.
-Unknown

But not one that will murder me like HAL.

6+
Funny minions meme about broke at christmas

Well I’m ready to start my Christmas shopping.
Who’s got some money I can use.
-Unknown

Read this for some money saving ideas at Christmas.

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