24 Funny Sayings About Life
![Funny Sayings About Life Relationship Wrecker Alarm](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-alarm-clock-break.jpg)
Me and my bed are perfect for each other,
but my alarm clock keeps trying to break us up.
Jealous!
![Funny Sayings About Life Backwards](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-day-backwards.jpg)
My day starts backwards…
i wake up tired and i go to bed wide awake.
Funny sayings about life that are so true.
![Funny Sayings About Life Electric Bill Not Paid](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-didnt-pay-electric.jpg)
The face you make
when you didn’t pay the electric bill.
Ooops.
![Funny Sayings About Life Need A Hug](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-huge-amount.jpg)
I need a
huge amount of money.
Or a small amount.
![Funny Sayings About Life Marriage](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-marriage-dating.jpg)
Marriage:
when dating goes too far.
Ha.
It might work.
![Funny Sayings About Life Regret](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-problem-solver.jpg)
When people tell me “you’re going to regret that in the morning,”
i sleep in until noon because i’m a problem solver.
Yeah!
![Funny Sayings About Life Feeling In Your Stomach](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-see-food-when.jpg)
That feeling you get in your stomach
when you see him food…
Oh food.
![Funny Sayings About Life Abs](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-want-books-ever.jpg)
I want
absolutely everybook, ever.
Accurate.
![Funny Sayings About Life Kale](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-kale-best.jpg)
The best part about kale
is not eating it.
It taste like smushy trees.
![Funny Sayings About Life Negativity](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-tacos-not-negativity.jpg)
Surround yourself with tacos
not negativity.
Tacos love you.
![Funny Sayings About Life 2 Tools](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-wd-40.jpg)
You need only two tools in life:
wd-40 and duct tape.
if it doesn’t move and should, use wd-40
if it moves and shouldn’t, use duct tape.
Funny sayings about life I hear from dads and grandpas!
![Funny Sayings About Life Friends](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-dont-lose-me.jpg)
It’s hard to find a friend who is:
95% talented
96% funny
98% loving
99% intelligent
and 100% sweet…
so don’t you dare…
lose me!!
I’m rare!
![Funny Sayings About Life Sunrise](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-sleep-sunrise.jpg)
There is no sunrise so beautiful
that it is worth waking me up to see it.
-mindy kaling
True.
An oldie but goodie.
![Funny Sayings About Life Monday Optional](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-monday-optional.jpg)
Monday
should be
optional.
Can it be? But then Tuesday would become Monday…
![Funny Sayings About Life Personal Information](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/facebook-nsa-edward-snowden-cia-confession-ecards-someecards-share-image-1479836896.png)
I’m not worried about the nsa seeing my personal information
since i already post all of it on facebook.
Enjoy 3893835 pictures of my cat.
![Funny Sayings About Life Sex](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-ajax.jpg)
I was offered sex today with a victoria’s secret model.
in exchange for that, i was supposed to advertise some kind
of bathroom cleaner on my facebook page.
of course i declined because i am a person of high moral
standards and strong will power.
just as strong as ajax, the incredibly strong bathroom cleanser.
now available in lemon scent and vanilla.
I see what you did there.
![Funny Sayings About Life Vodka](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-vodka.jpg)
Today is the kind of day where i wash vodka came out of my shower.
Science the sh*t out of this like now!
![Funny Sayings About Life Video Games](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-farmer-video-games.jpg)
If people were influenced by video games,
then the majority of facebook users would be farmers by now.
Oh gosh, remember Farmville?
![Funny Sayings About Life Facebook](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-facebook-messed.jpg)
If i have learned one thing since joining facebook
it’s that i am not nearly as messed up as i thought i was!
See, it’s useful!
![Funny Sayings About Life 99 Bobby Pins](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-99-bobby.jpg)
I’ve got 99 bobby pins
but i can’t find one.
Truer funny sayings about life had never been said!
![Funny Sayings About Life Sallie Mae](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-sallie-mae.png)
The only college friend you’ll have
for the rest of your life is sallie mae.
They’ll be there for you…
![Funny Sayings About Life White Teeth](https://thefunnybeavercomd030b.zapwp.com/q:i/r:0/wp:1/w:1/u:https://thefunnybeaver.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/funny-white-teeth.jpg)
If only my teeth were as white as my legs.
Blinding!