CEO cheating memes are back, and this time the punchline is a stock chart. On Sunday, Nov. 8, Nvidia CEO Jensen Huang sent his staff an email titled “A message to our company” admitting he had been unfaithful to his wife and apologizing to his family and colleagues (Axios published the full email). Nvidia’s board has opened an independent investigation into reports that he was targeted by a foreign intelligence effort, the company says he stays on as CEO, and the stock fell roughly 7% on Monday, according to CNN.
Huang asked people to give his family privacy, so they stay out of this. These memes are about the rest of us: the employees watching their stock options wobble, the early retirements that just got pushed back, and every boardroom in America suddenly shopping for bug sweepers. We captioned 23 classic meme templates for the occasion.
Stock options and retirement memes
1. Diversification? Never heard of her
Twenty years in the same jacket felt like a loyalty signal. Your financial advisor disagrees.
2. The wandering eye
For once, the investors are the ones getting looks.
3. Early retirement, rescheduled
Smile and nod. 2041 is a lovely year to retire.
4. Marked safe
Good news: nobody at the company is in danger of retiring early anymore.
5. Exit 12
The early-retirement exit is now closed for construction.
6. Still waiting
Friday’s price is out there somewhere. Bring snacks.
7. Surprised? Pikachu is
In hindsight, the plan had one tiny single point of failure.
Monday morning memes
8. The 9:29 a.m. dilemma
One minute before the opening bell, both buttons look terrible.
9. This is fine
Two years down, two to go. Everything is fine. Totally fine.
10. Panik, kalm, panik
The emotional range of a Sunday night inbox.
11. The elevator glance
The longest 14 floors of your career.
12. Big brain investing
Technically correct. The best kind of correct.
13. Finally, unity
Shareholders and employees have never agreed on anything this hard.
14. Corporate needs you to find the differences
Spoiler: there aren’t any.
15. Draw 25
Some people would rather hold 25 cards than one index fund.
Boardroom and PR memes
16. The boardroom suggestion
There’s always one person who says the quiet part out loud.
17. Is this damage control?
A company-wide email on a Sunday night: bold strategy.
18. Without interruption
Corporate statements read differently when you’ve just checked your portfolio.
19. Blame the jacket
Shareholders wanted one thing from this week: boredom.
20. Always has been
Turns out the whole AI boom has a weekend schedule too.
21. The mask comes off
And it would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren’t for that subject line.
22. Two CEO memes, one internet
2025 had the kiss cam. 2026 has the inbox.
23. Galaxy-brain investing
The real money is always in selling shovels. Or bug sweepers.
The Secret Santa gift for the boss who has everything
As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
For the boss who already owns the jet, the jacket and half the stock market: an RF bug sweeper. It scans a room for hidden cameras, GPS trackers and listening devices, and it comes with two antennas, so it looks like it came straight out of a spy movie. Here’s the JMDHKK bug detector on Amazon. Shopping for a guy who really does have everything? Browse our Amazon finds for men who have everything.
More laughs from The Funny Beaver
Need a break from the stock app? Try our funny retirement jokes (for when the retirement does happen), these relationship memes to share with your partner, or our look at why memes go viral in the first place.