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83 Of The Funniest Quotes Ever

Check out this collection for some great entertainment. 52 of the funniest quotes ever.

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You said it Abe!

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Therapists know everything.

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Funny sense of humor.

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Yep.

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Light’s on… no one home.

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Thinking long term.

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Nothing is a plan too.

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Classiness is overrated.

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Selfie sucker punchie?

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Ground hog day…

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Just say no and see their reaction!

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Silence is deadly.

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All about the hair.

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Force their hand.

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Sarcasm sucker punch.

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 Po-tay-to, Po-tah-to…

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Be prepared.

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And you’ll like it!

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Organization is my middle name.

Funniest Quotes Ever

Funniest Quotes Ever: Silence Is Golden.

Silence is golden.

And Don't Look Back.

And don’t look back.

Funniest Quotes Ever

Here We Go Again!

Here we go again!

Never A Good Thing.

Never a good thing.

Cocaine Water Down With Coffee?

Cocaine water down with coffee?

Funniest Quotes Ever: You Mean Spelt?

You mean spelt?

Funniest Quotes Ever: Episodic Normalcy.

Episodic normalcy.

Funniest Quotes Ever

Funniest Quotes Ever: Or Any Phone!

Or any phone!

Funniest Quotes Ever: D*Mn Those Plans.

D*mn those plans.

That Should Cut Down Them Selfies.

That should cut down them selfies.

Somehow One Seems To Feed The Other.

Somehow one seems to feed the other.

Don't Want To Socialize.

Don’t Want To Socialize.

Funniest Quotes Ever: Just Warning You.

Just warning you.

Yep And D*Mn Proud Of It!

Yep and d*mn proud of it!

And A Home In Kansas.

And a home in Kansas.

Nap At Home Sounds Soooo Good.

Nap at home sounds soooo good.

Can't Disappoint What You Don't Expect.

Can’t disappoint what you don’t expect.

Been There, Done That.

Been there, done that.

It's Ironic Not To Be Hypocritical?

It’s ironic not to be hypocritical?

Assuming Is A Dangerous Game.

Assuming is a dangerous game.

While I Have My Sunglasses On Inside.

While I have my sunglasses on inside.

Getting A Head Start!

Getting a head start!

Not Sure What Causes That...

Not sure what causes that…

Minutes Is The New 20 Minutes.

5 minutes is the new 20 minutes.

Can't Stop Them Witnesses.

Can’t stop them witnesses.

It All Depends On Which Side Of The Bed I Woke Up On.

It all depends on which side of the bed I woke up on.

Funniest Quotes Ever: Go Chef!

Go chef!

That's Why They Call Them The Ugly Truth!

That’s why they call them the ugly truth!

Funniest Quotes Ever: That's My Plan!

That’s my plan!

There's No Point To InBetween.

There’s no point to in-between.

Funniest Quotes Ever: Going Home Now.

Going home now.

The Older I Get, The More I Use Them!

The older I get, the more I use them!

Those Were The Days!

Those were the days!

I'm Not One For Being Dull.

I’m not one for being dull.

It's All About Choices. Which Are The Right Ones? The Prosecco, Of Course!

It’s all about choices. Which are the right ones? The prosecco, of course!

It's A Simple Question.

It’s a simple question.

One Day Maybe It Will Spin Me Right Out Of Here.

One day maybe it will spin me right out of here.

Age Old Question. Never Any Answer.

Age old question. Never any answer.

Beware Of This, Because It's The Things That You Like!

Beware of this, because it’s the things that you like!

Cupcakes Are Great Problem Solvers.

Cupcakes are great problem solvers.

Funniest Quotes Ever: Enjoy!

Enjoy!

Viola, Instant Iced Coffee!

Viola, instant iced coffee!

Might Want To Tone Down The Sass.

Might want to tone down the sass.

So I Decided Not To!

So I decided not to!

Are You Surprised? You Shouldn't Be.

Are you surprised? You shouldn’t be.

Now I Don't Want To!

Now I don’t want to!

Poor Thing Had To Deal With Everyone's Meals First Before She Could Eat Her Own.

Poor thing had to deal with everyone’s meals first before she could eat her own.

Choose Wisely Because They'll Also Be Annoying You.

Choose wisely because they’ll also be annoying you.

It's Going To Be A Week.

It’s going to be a week.

Why You're Not A Therapist, Exhibit 1.

Why you’re not a therapist, exhibit 1.

Let's Hope I Never Find Out.

Let’s hope I never find out.

I'm Dying To Have One!

I’m dying to have one!

And That's Not Bad. The Number Could Be Just 1.

And that’s not bad. The number could be just 1.

Great. Could It Just Be Even Thursday?

Great. Could it just be even Thursday?

So Close.. Yet So Far Away.

So close.. yet so far away.

Funniest Quotes Ever

But Now You Know, So...

But now you know, so…

Better Yet, If You Do It Without Her Telling You.

Better yet, if you do it without her telling you.

Funniest Quotes Ever: Good For You!

Good for you!

Funniest Quotes Ever

Sometimes When You're Not Having. Yes, Often Then.

Sometimes when you’re not having. Yes, often then.

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