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29 Funny Minion Quotes

Two Minions Cheering: Whatever You Do, Always Give 100%, Unless You Are Donating Blood

Then don’t go giving 100%! 

 

 

Waving Minion: The Next Time You Get A Call From A Blocked Number, Answer And Say It's Done, But There's Blood Everywhere

Just pray it’s not an important call!

 

Holiday Gift Guides

Funny gifts people will actually fight over in a white elephant swap

 

Puzzled Minion With One Sprout Of Hair Asking A Silly Question About Whether A Clown's Toot Smells Funny

There’s one to think about.

 

 

Winking Minion In Big Letters: I May Be A Bad Influence, But I'm Fun

You enjoy me, you do!

 

 

Minion Holding A Flower With A Letter: Dear Best Friend, You're Weird And Not Perfect, But Thanks For Being There. I Love You

Besties for life. 

 

 

Worried Minion: Disease Idiotitis Causes The Brain To Shut Down And The Mouth To Keep Talking. Best Defense, Slap And Run

I feel like it may never be cured.

 

 

Jumping Minion With Arms Up: You're Never Too Old To Do Goofy Stuff

So don’t worry about it!

 

 

Minion In A Maid Outfit: I'm Not Cleaning This Week, I'll Say The Dust And Cobwebs Are Halloween Decorations

Ooh, aren’t they spooky? This only works in October, pity. 

 

 

Two Minions, One With Red Hair: I Hate You, Then I Love You, Like I Want To Throw You Off A Cliff Then Rush To Catch You

Why are you the way you are?

 

 

Minion In A Cap And Hoodie: Back In My Day We Played Outside, Not Online. Yes, I Know I'm Old

Can we go back to those days?

 

 

Startled Minion Next To A Minion Dressed As A Ghost On Orange: Don't Scare Me, I Startle Easily

And then you’ll be scared!

 

 

Minion In A Fancy Coat: When I See A Clown Fish I Automatically Think Omg It's Nemo

OMG, is he lost again?!

 

 

Minion Grinning: Remember When People Got Mad If Someone Read Their Diary? Now They Post Everything Online

And now they add emojis and GIFs…

 

 

Minion Beside A List Of Human Body Facts That Ends With A Joke About Who Read The Whole Text

Hahahaha!

 

 

Minion Comic: No Facebook, No Twitter, No Whatsapp, So What Do You Have? A Life! Then A Game Request Arrives

Better give him two.

 

 

Minion Standing Straight: I'm In Shape. Unfortunately That Shape Is A Potato

It’s a nice shape regardless.

 

 

Minion In A Spider Costume On A Web: Seeing A Spider Isn't A Problem. It Becomes A Problem When It Disappears

Spider, spider, where did you go?

 

 

Minion Posing Proudly: I'm Great In Bed. I Can Sleep For Days

 I hate to brag but it’s kind of my super power.

 

 

Spider Identification Chart Where Every Spider Says Smash It Or Set On Fire, With A Minion Holding Toy Guns

Might want to add “RUN LIKE HELL.”

 

 

Minion Pointing At A Big Cartoon Spider: Always Face Your Fears, Except Spiders. Run, Scream, Do Whatever It Takes

See? Run from the spider.

 

 

Minion With A Clipboard: Things To Do Today. Get Up, Survive, Go Back To Bed

Somewhere in there it should say “eat” a couple times.

 

 

Annoyed Minion: I Hate It When You Have To Be Nice To Someone You Really Want To Throw A Brick At

It’s so hard.

 

 

Thinking Minion: Ever Looked At Your Ex And Wondered, Was I Drunk The Entire Relationship?

Surely that must be the case.

 

 

Minion Student With An Apple: Teacher, Why Are You Talking In My Lesson? Student, Why Are You Teaching During My Conversation?

He got the teacher there!

 

 

Screaming Minion: If One Door Opens And Another One Closes, Your House Is Haunted

Run and call the mystery gang!

 

 

Two Minions Jumping For A High Five: Great Minds Think Alike, But Mischievous Minds Work TogetherWhat’s more fun? A dirty mind or a great mind?

 

 

 

Glum Minion: When I Find It, I Don't Need It. When I Need It, I Can't Find It

Story of my life.

 

 

Minion Holding His Head: Listening To My Wife Is Like Reading The Terms And Conditions Of A Website. I Understand Nothing But Say I Agree

It’s the smart move.

 

 

Minion In A Grass Skirt And Coconut Top: I Need A Vacation, Someone Kidnap Me Please

I’m not picky on the destination. Maybe Bali? Hawaii?

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